Finding the Perfect Lipstick

Earlier this week, I posted a photo on Instagram of me wearing Maybelline’s Untainted Spice. I had bought the matte lipstick because it resembled my Laura Mercier Dulce de Leche lipstick, which is running low, and also because with my tight budget, I couldn’t afford the Laura Mercier kind (sob!).

Anyway, I have been wondering if I wear the right color for my lips. I was once told that I have the perfect skin tone to wear red lipstick – the bright, pinup style. So, I wore that kind of lipstick often, only to be told it didn’t look good on me.

I even have a Mulberry Luster Matte lipcolor from Sephora that gives, well, a mulberry color, which I’ve received quite a few compliments on. It’s a bold color, and when I bought it, I was in the mood to be bold.

But I’ve been debating lately what looks best on me. It looks like some of the lip color that I own don’t look too good on me. I do like dark red colors, so I hope to find the right lip color for my complexion and hair.

Finding the perfect lipstick feels like a pain. Heck, finding all makeup that looks good on you feels like quite the hunt. It is all trial and error.

Yes, that’s it: trial and error. Finding the right lipstick, eyeliner, eyeshadow, etc., is all trial and error. Sometimes you pick something that looks right, only to realize some time later, it never looked good in the first place. Other times you put something on, unsure if it actually looks good, only to receive numerous praises.

Trial and error. That’s how a woman tries to look good.

 

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I Finally Did It!

I did it! I finally did it!

Took me 14 days, but I finally did one of my New Years’ resolutions: exercise regularly.

After days of saying I need to exercise more following the holidays, while also stuffing my face with too many snacks, I finally set some time aside today and worked out. I did push-ups, squats and sit-ups. All 25 each, which is the most I can do with my weak body (I’m not really weak, just quite out of shape). Hopefully as time goes on, I bring that number up to 50, 75 and even 100.

I have gained a little weight this past year. Thanks to the meds I am on, my metabolism is slower. I also have been eating the wrong foods lately. This is all deja vu from when I first became overweight, back in 2010. It was then that I topped my heaviest at 210 pounds. I do not want to weight that much ever again, so I am making an effort to slim down, firm up and also get my heart rate going.

In case you are wondering, I joined Weight Watchers and then moved to Brooklyn and did tons of walking. I then slimmed down to about 165 pounds. But I still wasn’t really slim. I have – and always had – heavy thighs and a flat tire. Even though I used to squeeze into a size 6 pair of pants, I still had some flab. Imagine if I lost enough to go into a size 4?

Right now, my scale tilts at 178 pounds, which leaves me in dismay. One of the reasons why I started this blog was to keep tabs on eating healthy and living healthy. The fact that I typed this post up is a way of committing myself to living a healthier life.

Monday is a holiday, so I’ll be off from work then. I’ll exercise that day as well, and possibly Wednesday or Thursday. I want to start by exercising three days a week for a few minutes before moving it up to a half hour.

Maybe if all goes well, I’ll look super amazing this summer.

 

Review: Blue Lagoon Iceland Silica Mud Mask

A former roommate gave me a sample of Blue Lagoon Iceland Silica Mud Mask that she simply wanted to get rid of a few months ago. I kept it around all this time, promising to try it, until tonight. I decided to give this mus mask a try, since I have been experimenting with masks lately.

In case you don’t know, Blue Lagoon is a famed geothermal spa in Iceland, and this mask comes from the mud around the location. Here’s an article from Bustle and another from We3Travel about this spa.

As I applied the white mud, the skin on my cheeks started to sting. I got concerned that I was probably allergic to this, and wondered if my face would be left with red irritated spots – or worse.

The stinging continued and it felt a bit like my skin was being burned. Slowly, though, it subsided. Once the white mud mask hardened after about five minutes, I was able to remove it.

The results? My skin was glowing a little, and felt softer. But not as soft as the time I tried putting avocado on my face, and my skin has glowed even more before. So I give the Blue Lagoon Iceland Silica Mud Mask an so-so, like a B- rating. The stinging was not necessary but at least my face was not red or anything afterwards.

 

Letting Go of Grudges

As 2017 gets underway, I am aiming to do better than I did last year, and this time, I am determined to do so. There’s a lot that I do want to repeat from 2016. Among these are bearing grudges against those who harmed me.

Last year, I carried a lot of weight from previous years around, and it took a toll on me. I ended up suffering from deep depression, angry outbursts, and cynicism. While I knew I was better off letting go of what was done to me, rather than holding on to it so tightly, I simply couldn’t let go of the grudges. I felt it was justified. After all, I had been slandered, bullied and harassed. I was scorned for things I did not do. I suffered a severe mental breakdown as a result.

So why not carry around a grudge? I had every right to be angry at those who hurt me.

But as the clock struck midnight this Sunday, I was beginning to realize that if I wanted a better year and better me for 2017, I needed to let go. I needed to let go of all the anger I had. That anger was not doing me any good, and it certainly was not hurting those who had hurt me. They went on with their lives, unharmed and unaffected by what they did to me. It sucks, but that’s reality. Karma is supposed to be a bitch, but sometimes it is unreliable.

As for me, I was turning into a moody, angry and/or depressed person. You know the saying, “refusing to forgive is like swallowing poison and hoping the other guy gets sick”? Yep, that was what I was going through. And if those who had hurt me were to know I was still suffering, I’m sure they would’ve laughed.

So, I am taking steps to let the hurt and anger go. It is not doing me any good. It is not making me healthier. It is not making me happier, more confident, or more nicer. It is making me unstable, unreliable and unhappy. I’m still letting those who hurt me have power over me.

It is good to know that forgiveness is not about trusting someone or willing to be friends with them again. I think Lauryn Hill said it best with this song:

It is not easy to let go of grudge, but I think the key is to soften up one’s pride and ego, and stop playing the victim. Of course, we were all victims once of someone’s malicious ways, and we have a right to be angry. But after a while, that anger turns into victimhood and it doesn’t turn you into the best of human beings. And honestly, do you want to be as bad as those who had hurt you?

Sometimes Jesus Christ’s teachings about forgiveness sounds absurd, even to this Christ follower, but in the end, holding grudges no longer makes sense.

One day at a time, I’ll be letting go. I want this year to be so much better than last year. And I can’t have that if I carry my grudges.

I’ve learned that carrying grudges ruins your self-respect because you’re allowing those you don’t even like to have control over you. I remember one church sign that read: “He who angers you controls you.” If you don’t like someone, why give them control over you? And turn you into a mess?

Let it go…